Teaching from the evening meditation

Heartroot, July 4, 2013

50s and 60s children who caused problems for their mothers would be threatened with, “Just wait until your Father gets home!” When Dad got back from work, Mom snitched on the kids and he was expected to mete out appropriate punishment. Mothers were believed to be impotent – unable to do anything but become frustrated with insubordination, relying on and requiring the male authority to be on her side in order to have any control or power.

Our concepts of male strength involve dominance, either intellectually, physically, materially or morally. Feminine strength has been typically defined in terms of perseverance: putting up with abuse and neglect and still continuing to give and give and give. The righteous victim becomes a martyr with moral strength, as in, “My mother was a saint”.

We also know what masculine strength in a female body looks like.  Not necessarily enthused by a destiny of martyrdom, western woman has quite wholeheartedly embraced a male definition of Right and Might – we’ve learned to be smart, efficient and capable – to do stuff – and we manage to get an awful lot done…!

Positive power and strength in its feminine guise does have a lot to do with endurance, but not of tolerating a life of suffering.  It is the ability to remain aligned and rooted, no matter what Life has in store for us, keeping our hearts open as sorrow, rage and ecstasy wash equally through us, wave upon wave.  It is the ability to simply sit still and receive Life, perceiving all the things that normally escape us because we are so busy running around…doing stuff.

As we gradually learn to balance and access the masculine and feminine energies within each one of us, men and women alike,  the sword of intellect is wielded with wisdom and compassion, physical strength is used to protect the vulnerable, material power is shared, and the spark of Source is witnessed in all Beings.   The historical and habitual denial and diminution of the Feminine can no longer be allowed, so boundaries and limitations must be set with loving and firm intent.

It takes courage to sit still and not continue to addictively consume food… ideas… people… whatever will keep us entertained and distracted. It takes courage to just Be, allowing acute perception and consciousness of whatever arises from within and that we gather around ourselves.

This is strength in its feminine form, and this is what is asked of us now….

Blessèd Be….

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4 Responses to Teaching from the evening meditation

  1. Hola Dawn, just upon reading this, I wonder about the role of anger in all of this, of that anger that we have learned to hide but that now we need to learn to “receive” (within ourselves). Sometimes this feminine state of being is associated with “it’s all well and good”, perhaps even “ignoring” some uncomfortable arising feelings, help please?!

    • dawnbramadat says:

      Hola, Ramiro! Thank you for this question….

      Anger is a reaction to fear, and so arises when we perceive our identities being threatened. The threat can be either to the physical identity (ex. someone attacking you with a knife) or to any of the other complex aspects of how we define ourselves – our ethnic origin, religion, favorite football team,family members and traditions, etc…(“Your Mama….!”).

      Anger sometimes arises when an obstacle is placed in our way: how strongly one is identified with a particular path and how much of one’s personal value is wrapped up in the accomplishing of this path will determine the extent of the anger and frustration.

      When we do not allow ourselves anger, having learned that we will be punished for it – “Nice” people don’t get angry, etc. – we suppress this energy, to fester inside us. The image I often get is of a woman with a too-big smile and a knife held behind her back…or that classic shot of Jack Nicholson in “The Shining”…!

      I’ve often thought of getting a bumper-sticker printed that says,”Nice Kills!”…. The requirement that has been historically placed on women, but now is impressed on all of society, to be sweet, nice, complacent sheep – and above all, to never, ever get angry, has dried up our juices and turned us into nasty, bitter, passive-aggressive ghosts of who we could be. Let’s get rid of Nice and replace it with Honest!

      We have to be conscious here that Honest means really taking a hard look at our anger, not just spewing it in vengeful catharsis. If we let it out on a punching-bag, for example, imagining we’re attacking the person or situation we blame, we are actually directing the rage back at a reflection ourselves, and end up just feeding a more and more vicious cycle.

      This is an important point – we call people and situations to us in our lives to reflect what we do not yet understand about ourselves – the internalised voices we have not recognised. So you’re angry at your boss, but your boss is reflecting to you the beliefs about yourself that you learned from your father…. If you remain on the surface of this understanding and stay pissed off at your boss, nothing will get resolved – you’ll just get more and more angry. Realising that you are angry at your father deepens the understanding but does not free you of the anger. You are actually angry because you have come to believe what your dad said about you and are going about your life doing your damnedest to prove its not true anyway…!

      If you suppress the anger and keep swallowing it, it will eventually take so much energy to contain it inside you that you won’t have any left for the outside world – you will become depressed.

      If instead you can see the anger as energy, and you do physical things that will help you consciously release the energy – ex. using a punching-bag, but imagining the anger flowing out of you and into the bag – the life force in your body will begin to move again.

      When Life energy is moving in our bodies, healing will eventually occur as part of a natural process…

      Enough said for now, I think…I could go on and on….!

      Abrazos y gratitud,

  2. Can I just say exactly what a relief to find someone who actually knows just what theyre talking about on the internet. You need to know how to carry an issue to light and earn it crucial. More people have to read this and also understand this facet of the tale. I cannot believe youre not more popular simply because you definitely possess the gift.

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